Genesis 38:20

Genesis 38:20 says, And Judah sent the kid by the hand of his friend the Adullamite, to receive his pledge from the woman’s hand: but he found her not.  Judah attempted to fulfill his pledge, but his friend could not find the woman.  I am not sure what he told his friend, but evidently Judah did not want to go himself.  We cannot expect our friends to fulfill our obligations, especially spiritually ones.  Verse twenty-one states, Then he asked the men of that place, saying, Where is the harlot, that was openly by the way side? And they said, There was no harlot in this place.  We are told that the friend at least thought he knew that he was looking for a harlot, but not that he said why.  Those that he talked to may have thought that he owed the woman something.  Verse twenty-two adds, And he returned to Judah, and said, I cannot find her; and also the men of the place said, that there was no harlot in this place.  The friend returned to Judah with news that could have been considered either good or bad.  The woman couldn't be found which could have been good, but she still had Judah's things, which could have been bad.  There is never an easy way to get out of a sinful situation without some cost, especially spiritually, and we must accept the responsibility for it individually.  Even though as followers of Christ we are forgiven of our sins, we must still accept the responsibility for them in order for them to be forgiven.  Verse twenty-three says, And Judah said, Let her take it to her, lest we be shamed: behold, I sent this kid, and thou hast not found her.  Judah basically said to just let things go, unless we be shamed.  His friend had done nothing to be shamed by, but too often we like Judah want to have our friends share the shame of our sins.  Verse twenty-four states, And it came to pass about three months after, that it was told Judah, saying, Tamar thy daughter in law hath played the harlot; and also, behold, she is with child by whoredom. And Judah said, Bring her forth, and let her be burnt.  Three months later, word came to Judah that Tamar was pregnant, and he condemned her to be burned.  Judah was willing to pay a harlot that he had been with, but was ready to condemn his daughter-in-law to death.  Of course, Judah was as guilty of the same sin that he was condemning her for.  We are often more willing to see others condemned for their sins than we are to think that we should be condemned for ours.  Verse twenty-five declares, When she was brought forth, she sent to her father in law, saying, By the man, whose these are, am I with child: and she said, Discern, I pray thee, whose are these, the signet, and bracelets, and staff.  When Tamar was brought out to face the charges, she produced Judah's signet, bracelets, and staff and said the owner was the father of her child.  I don't know if other people recognized them, but Judah certainly did.  We can be certain that our sins will find us out, in the judgment of Christ if not before.  Verse twenty-six states, And Judah acknowledged them, and said, She hath been more righteous than I; because that I gave her not to Shelah my son. And he knew her again no more.  At least Judah acknowledged his guilt, even more than getting her pregnant.  He had not given Shelah to Tamar as her husband as he had promised.  If failure to live up to our promises leads someone else to sin, we cannot feel that they deserve to be punished more than we do.  Verse twenty-seven states, And it came to pass in the time of her travail, that, behold, twins were in her womb.  Then verse twenty-eight adds, And it came to pass, when she travailed, that the one put out his hand: and the midwife took and bound upon his hand a scarlet thread, saying, This came out first. Tamar gave birth to twins and the midwife put a scarlet ribbon on the wrist of what she thought would be the first born.  Verse twenty-nine adds, And it came to pass, as he drew back his hand, that, behold, his brother came out: and she said, How hast thou broken forth? this breach be upon thee: therefore his name was called Pharez.  The other son was actually born first.  Then verse thirty concludes, And afterward came out his brother, that had the scarlet thread upon his hand: and his name was called Zarah.  I guess we could say that this was an unusual birth, but both sons were born and named.  We cannot always determine how events will play out in life, but as followers of Christ, we must always accept them as they happen.